Spinning the colorwheel

People keep asking me when I haven't blogged recently. Well, it turns out life in Cupertino is boring and does not lend itself to exciting posts.  For example, we went to a street fair in Mountain View last month. Maybe my expectations were set too high from all the festivals I'd been to in San Francisco. Of course I knew it wouldn't be like the Fillmore Jazz Festival or even the Union Street Fair, but the whole thing was pretty much summed up by the two drink minimum. Not that debauchery makes a great street fair but the rigidity of rules is pretty indicative of the spirit of the event. And so far I'm finding that's the spirit of Silicon Valley - work hard then go back to San Francisco to play.

We also ventured out to San Jose one Friday night - I know, we should have known better. We went to sake bar which had great apps and, of course, sake-tinis. But the crowd at this place was nuts. The girls running around made Marina girls look chaste. We ventured back to San Jose during the day but it turned out that Saturday happened to be FanimeCon. If you don't know what that is, consider yourself lucky.

I tried to take matters into my own hands and threw a party for the Tony Awards. I had a few theatre friends come, but other than our guest list consisted of Appletinis and other Tech-ites. I know what you're thinking, techies and Tonys may not be a winning combination. But we created a Tony Bingo game to engage our guests. (And by we I mean I requested a Bingo game and my husband wrote a visual basic macro in excel to make the boards from scratch.) I was actually really impressed with his game. He had squares such as "someone makes a Spiderman joke" and "Neil Patrick Harris costume change." Our technical crew appreciated the "John Malkovich Siri commercial airs" square, but they seemed to quickly lose interest in the game. Don't get me wrong - quite a few people played the game, artsy and techie folks alike, but I quickly realized why we only throw viewing parties for sporting events. The guests are really into the game, and I'm not so I don't mind replenishing platters and mixing drinks. That is not quite the case when it comes to musicals. Back to the drawing board...

Get your Tech on

This weekend I made my first venture to the Tech Museum. I've been pestering my husband about going for awhile, but for some reason he didn't get that a tech museum in the heart of Silicon Valley would be incredibly well-funded. Well, let me tell you - it was awesome! It was like the Exploratorium but on speed and completely adult-friendly. That being said, there were a lot of kids there and we didn't have the heart to elbow them out of the way so we could play. But we did watch them and took over the exhibits whenever there was a gap in the parade of wee ones.

One of the best parts of the Museum was the Tech Tag. You can scan your ticket at a bunch of the interactive stations and take pictures of what you're doing. Then you can create your own website to show all the cool stuff you did at the Museum. My husband was a little website-ed out due to my recent abusive behavior on the CSS front, so we didn't take too much time at that station. (Someone has to make my artistic vision a reality when Wordpress falls short.)

We were there a couple hours and it was not enough time to see/play with everything. I've already marked our calendar for our next Tech-outing - we didn't even make it to IMAX!  To get your ultimate Tech-on check out the After Hours on the first Wednesday of each month. What could be better than science, games and cocktails?

Ladies who Lunch (at Apple)

I am completely spoiled in that whenever I'm sick of eating a turkey sandwich for lunch I can just pop over to Apple. I'm even more spoiled that when I have friends in time going to lunch at Apple is always on the vacation agenda.

Today was one such occasion and my friend Trey and I struck off for some Infinite Looping. It quickly turned into looping as the campus was spilling over with Appletinis today and the parking situation was worse than at Darius Rucker's appearance last Friday. It is also a very gray day down in Appleville which seemed to encroach on everyone's mood. Of course that did not slow Trey down as he experienced Apple-land for the first time. (Though, he was disappointed to learn there is no tram circling the parking lot.)

Highlights of our lunch included comments such as "Apple should start a baroque ensemble and call it Infinite Lute" and "Why are there so many apples in the cafeteria?" The conversation took a downhill plunge upon entering the Corporate Store. The tag line t-shirts now include a tribute to Siri but they are still only in men's shirts. Apparently women don't want to wear a shirt asking Siri if its warm enough to wear a t-shirt. Even toddler's are in on the fun now with shirts proclaiming their Mac compatibility. But no, not women. We brainstormed briefly on what the women's line should say and who should be pinged, but unfortunately I don't think the favorite are appropriate for general consumption. Ping me separately and I'll send them on over to you.  

In any rate, keep a lookout for Trey's iFail line coming soon to a CafePress near you.

Loving your Lemons

You know that feeling when you stumble across a website that you know you are going to have a long relationship with? You know, like when you first saw Facebook (if you can remember that far back) or more recently when first got lost in the beauty of Pinterest. It is that magical excitement of all that is to be. And when you see that the site is still in beta? Thrilling!

So I'm sure you can imagine my excitement when I first dove into LemonCrate. It is a shopper's wonderland. Literally, you can shop for hours in the comfort of your own home with your coffee and slippers, or in your office Monday morning when the week has become too real already. You can scroll forever and never run out of gorgeous shoes and sassy sunglasses to drool over. You can customize as you go and mark items as 'love this' or search for similar peep toe heels. Or you can just create your own search by color, price, brand, whatever. But unlike slogging through google shopping or Zappos it's fun! The website is sleek and stunning and incredible addictive.

As if this couldn't get any better when you do find an item you have to add to your closet you can pull up the price history. You can see all the stores carrying that perfect clutch and what they are asking for as the purchase price. Some items even give you the lowest price in recent history so you can plan out when to make your big purchase. And if you can't make up your mind you can easily send it to your girlfriend for her feedback. It's the complete shopping experience but without the lines and the hassle of a department store. It has the boutique feel we all crave, but you can compare earrings from different boutiques. Genius. 

As I said it is still in beta so not all features are on every item but its getting there. Plus, the best part of beta is giving feedback on the features you want to see. I know you're still upset about being the last person in your group to start pinning so here is your chance to get ahead of the curve. Get out there and start loving this at LemonCrate!

(If you don't know where to start check out the Kate Spade page for inspiration. Ahhh, Kate Spade...)

Groupon with some Padding

I'm sorry for my disappearance on the blog front the last few days. I am back now and ready for action.

I had hoped to post an update on the new iPad but I'm afraid its still too hot a topic. (Don't worry I won't make any 'how many new iPads does it take to bake a cookie' jokes.) Despite this, over 3 million were sold in the first four days of availability. It certainly makes you wonder how many will be sold when people figure out all the new features besides just the incredible screen. We'll have to wait for the next round of commercials since that is the only user's guide Apple provides for its incredible products. Of course this isn't too upsetting since there is a bushel of Apple Geniuses standing by to answer every question and demonstrate every feature.  Personally, I can't wait to worm through the throngs of people at the Apple Store to check out the new games on display for the iPad.


Of course one app that doesn't need a killer display is Groupon. I have received the groupon eblast for quite some time but had not ventured over to the app until recently. Why didn't anyone tell me it was so great? (I'm sure all of the daily deal apps are phenomenal but this is the first one I've tried so far. Anyone using Living Social or Bloomspot?)

I am finding a great way to explore my new hometown, and really all of Silicon Valley, is through daily deals. Its a relatively pain free and low risk way to find great places. Yesterday I found a cute little nail salon running a groupon deal for a shellac manicure. It was only $20, that's right $20! In the city you could pay $20 just to add the shellac to your regular manicure. Amazing. But the real beauty of it was I found a deal happening that day, paid for it and redeemed it all on my iPhone. It is really pretty ingenious and so much better than probing through the emails and remembering that pesky little voucher.

Well done Groupon. Well done.

Tweet Smarts

I ventured onto Twitter for the first time this week. I know, I know, I am so behind the times and totally not cool, but I never really understood the draw before. Now that I've been dangling my toes in the bird bath for a couple days I'm starting to get it. Its nice getting my daily cliff notes of everything I should have read or heard about. For example, did you hear Britney Spears joined Path? Haven't we already had a close enough look at her life?

That being said I am totally the nerd who looked at the tutorial just to make sure I got it all. (No shame here, I already admitted how completely uncool I am.) But at least I got on twitter before my husband. He is still standing strong against the tweet wave and offered me no help when setting up my profile.

So now I turn to you for help. Are any of you on twitter? Can you share secrets of the trade and the best tweeters to follow?

Pies-R-Us

In honor of Pi Day I am indulging in an ode to pies. I LOVE baking pies. Unfortunately I love eating pies as well so they don't make an appearance in my kitchen often. Many people seem to be intimidated of the pie-making process, which I attribute largely to the crust portion of the ordeal. Homemade pie crust is one of the best things in the world, so if you have the time, go for it instead of going with the store-bought crust. After all, it doesn't really matter how perfect your pie looks - it matters how it tastes! Below is my tried and true pie crust recipe. (Which by my I mean my mother's, and by mother's I mean whoever she took it from. Ah the glory of family recipes!) Baking may be difficult at time but I'm a big believer in instructions. If you follow the recipe it will turn out. If you don't it may not. And that is why my husband isn't allowed to bake. Well, the lack of instruction-following attitude and his tendency to throw in random ingredients. He once made me a dirty orange martini - don't ask.

If you want a delicious tasting pie but need to know it will actually be delicious and won't take an entire day to bake check out Real Simple. Like many women I believe Real Simple has an answer for everything. And for you more adventurous bakers look to Tasting Table for inspiration. This savory spin on an apple pie may make me lift my pie ban in our kitchen.

Or if you don't want an entire pie jump on the pie pop bandwagon. You can buy a pie pop maker or try making them by hand. Here are some great tips and and a yummy recipe courtesy of South By San Francisco.

The Apple Pi

And for those who hoped for something related to math or general geekery on this fine holiday - I'm sorry. That is just not my forte. But here is a joke courtesy of my husband:
What do you get when you cut a jack o'lantern by its diameter? A pumpkin pi!

Pie Crust:
2 cups sifted flour
1 teaspoon salt
3/4 cup shortening
1/3 cup ice cold water


Combine flour and salt. Cut in shortening until mixture resemble coarse crumbs. Stir in water until mixture forms a ball. Divide dough in half, and shape into balls. Wrap in plastic, and refrigerate for 4 hours or overnight. Roll out on a floured counter and use as directed in pie recipe. 

Slapping it On

One of my favorite accessories is my iPod nano. That's right, I said accessories. Yes the nano is amazing on the go and especially for running. Of course lately the Nike run history is just making me feel guilty that I haven't been out more. But the BEST part of the nano is the watch feature. I wear mine nearly every day. For one thing it is really cute. For another, I can switch the watch face to match my mood, the occasion or my outfit. But mainly it is filled with my favorite pictures so throughout the day I can look down and see something that makes me laugh.

I wanted the option of wearing my nano in professional settings so I went with the Hex leather band. It is not as daring and fun as some of the others but the black band goes with just about everything while still being understated. Well, as understated as a watch can be with a giant square face that is. Of course the options are really endless with the bands. And if you go with the bolder colors you can get a few to mix and match with your favorite shoes or purses. They are even making bands based off of slap bracelets if you really want to get crazy. (Of course it's great for guys to wear them as well, but the women are really going to have more fun with this.)

And if you enjoy wearing your Apple pride on your sleeve you may want to check out Mohzy. They have designer iPod/iPhone cable "loops" which end up being awesome bracelets. I may have invested in a few versions if I didn't have so many cables stashed around the house. (The joys of living with a geek - I find a new cable hidden away nearly every day, but at least I know what the Apple cables are for.) But this product would be great for students or someone always on the go. It is also ideal when traveling so you'll never be stranded with a phone running on empty.

Duking it out in Planet Tech

Since moving to Cupertino I have heard endlessly about the Duke of Edinburgh. It is an English Pub in a Chinese shopping center, and happens to be across the street from our apartment. We have ventured over for dim sum but had not made the journey for fish and chips. Which is really silly considering every local I have met knew where I lived in reference to the Duke. Apparently, it is quite a hot spot for techies and locals alike. It is close to a few of the Apple campuses, as is everything in Cupertino, but it is also across from HP so it qualifies as a diverse tech-spot.

Surprisingly the food was not bad. That is how I've heard the food described by everyone so far - surprisingly not bad. There are plenty of beers on tap and a nice full bar selection if beer doesn't tickle your fancy. It is kitschy and ancient which is probably why it is such a staple in Cupertino life, but I did have a great time there. However, I was with a group of Appletinis who were highly entertaining, which I'm sure influenced my assessment of the place.

I have genuinely liked and appreciated everyone I have met at Apple so far. They have all been sweet, personable and crazy smart. That being said, watching a group of Apple-ites in a social setting is like being at the zoo - they are absolutely fascinating. And no matter what, you (the non-tech person) are just an outsider observing the conversation. It's not that they try to exclude me. It is actually the opposite. They try to steer the conversation into something that may interest me and ask me questions about my work, but the conversation quickly turns back to tech. The magnetic pull is just too strong.

And then I am left to sit back in awe and admiration for the tech culture. It really is a country in and of itself, with its own language, customs and traditions. I try to follow what they are talking about and listen for key words to keep me on track - as anyone learning a new language would do. I marvel at their jokes and wonder what I'm missing about that particular term or code that is so funny. And every time they speak to the waitress I wonder if they are picturing her as the chick from the cover of Dungeons and Dragons. I realize this is a terrible stereotype that I should not continue. But one of the most defining moments in my relationship with my husband was the first time I heard him speak Dungeons and Dragons to a pre-pubescent kid in a comic book store. And yes they were both eyeing the chick on the cover.

Musiccas

A friend of mine sent me the link to his new company, Musiccas. And let me tell you, I was floored. "MUSICCAS streamlines the media intensive audition process by automating the submission and receipt of audition material." That is directly from the website which also has a snazzy video about the process. But it really does just that - it makes auditioning simple. The concept is so straightforward and incredibly needed that it truly is genius. I am amazed at the thought process when people run into a problem or an annoyance in their daily life, and one day realize this is ridiculous. And not only is it ridiculous but it doesn't need to be this way and I'm going to change it. Now given, this isn't that astounding in Silicon Valley. Everyday someone comes up with a brilliant idea that is marketable. What impresses me about Musiccas and its founder is the application of improvement to something as traditional as classical music.

Don't get me wrong, classical music is changing every day. Incredible musicians are advancing and modernizing what the classical masters wrote constantly. But what is great about Musiccas is that it goes straight to the heart of the institution and structure of classical music. It may not seem like such a huge deal to digitize the audition process for those who have never gone through it, but what a relief to upload one video and send it on its merry way. And not just one merry way but to every festival for the coming season. It is miraculous for the amateur musician practicing 8 hours a day to see where he stands in the audition process worldwide with a click of a button.

Musiccas is another example of the incredible ingenuity that flourishes in Silicon Valley. 

For Love of the Launch

Apple Launch Day is a mystical time when fantasies become realities and the whole world wait's on baited breath. But what I love the most about Launch Day is that it is the most honest day in our household. 

Suddenly, my husband can tell me about his day - not everything, but somethings. It is phenomenal. Because just like every Apple guy my husband loves his work and all things Apple. He can't wait to discuss every point of the announcement.

The new iPad apps will make my impressive workarounds on the iPad 2 unnecessary. 

Have you watched the trailer for the new Infinity Blade?

Siri is learning Japanese! 

Yes, the excitement goes on and on and I absolutely love it. Of course I am only guessing at what the highlights of the conversation will be since my husband hasn't made his way home yet. But I am well prepared for when he walks in the door. However, I must admit I had never watched a keynote until joining the Apple family. Now I can't wait to see everything that's rolled out and line up all my questions for when my husband gets home. You know why it is so great? Because he can answer me!

To have all your questions answered just visit the Apple homepage. You can watch the entire keynote or just see the stunning new iPad and new Apple TV.

Factoring in Fido

San Francisco is one of the dog-friendliest cities on earth. Dogs actually outnumber kids, which is obvious when frequenting the city’s parks – the kids are fenced in, not the dogs. 

Most places in the city will turn a blind eye to a dog trotting through the aisles, but I'm sorry to say I just haven't been too adventurous with my girls down in Cupertino. It is very jarring after living in the city for so long to not be able to walk my dogs while running errands. First of all, nothing is walking distance from my apartment expect for boba tea - which of course I'm grateful for. Secondly, I'm afraid store owners would start screaming if a dog tried to patron their establishment. It's a legitimate fear considering there are absolutely zero dog parks in the city of Cupertino. Apple should actually be ashamed to be located in a city that is so dog unfriendly. 

Thankfully, I have Fido Factor. If you have a dog it is a godsend. It’s basically Yelp for your dog and of course its free. You can search for all nearby bars, restaurants and shops which allow dogs. They even list which have water bowls and poop bags. Don't miss the golden paw print for tips on each location. The app doesn't cover all cities yet but it seems to do a good job in the Bay Area. It is definitely a must have for life in the South Bay. 

If Apple Ran the World

Last night my husband and I traded in our car. We had received quotes from the Salesperson and knew what we wanted before we arrived. It seemed like it would be a fairly straightforward affair, as straightforward as any car purchase can be. We arrived at the dealership at 7pm with excitement in our eyes and left at 11pm feeling a little dead inside. What went wrong you ask? Well, we were at a car dealership.

But the whole ordeal made me wonder - What would it be like if Apple ran the world?

Can you imagine what a pleasant experience buying a car would be with Apple at the helm? To start with, you would never have to search endlessly for a salesperson. Apple Stores are the only stores in the world that overflow with staff who in actually are completely irrelevant. After all, you can go to an Apple Store and purchase your new laptop case without ever speaking to an employee. All you need is your iPhone and an iTunes account, and you are on your way.

The endless forms and paperwork would be gone. No excuses of why "it can't go digital because we need too many signatures" like we heard last night. No justification of "we need a live signature or we have to send your fingerprints to the bank." Absolutely not. With Apple we would just blindly click the accept on the Terms and Conditions and never have to see the pages and pages of clauses. Nothing bad would happen with that blind click and South Park will remain the boy who cried wolf.

There would be no haggling over price either. None of this "write down your counteroffer here and I'll take it back to my manager" bullshit. Because Apple, thankfully, tells it like it is - "You'll pay what we tell you to pay and you'll be thankful to buy our products." And we are thankful! And we can't wait until they tell us what to buy next.

So thank you, Apple. Thank you for making the world a better place, and please consider going into the car business.

Oh Google- Why have you forsaken me?

I LOVE all things Google. I know, I know, I'm not supposed to admit that as an Apple Wife - but its absolutely true. I use Gmail and have never even opened Mail or iCal. I make my husband use Google Calendar so we can synchronize our lives. I don't believe other search engines exist and have only recently been swayed to start using Flipboard, though I still jump on Google Reader before pinning. (Pinterest that is.)

But since moving to Cupertino, Google has started to fail me. Google Maps that is. I have relied heavily on google maps to navigate my way around town but it seems to be a crapshoot. Cupertino is really odd in that streets meld into each other. But instead of the name just changing the street literally ends and the other street starts on the other side of a sidewalk that has suddenly appears in front of my car. I can see my destination on the other side, but short of jumping the curb I have to find another way around. Given, bikers and pedestrians can cross through and continue on their merry way, but cars can't. I am no newbie to google maps. I search for driving directions, not walking directions. So why does google maps keep failing me and sending me in circles? And why does this odd scenario only take place in Cupertino?

I have come to the only logical conclusion - Google hates Apple and will screw all living in Cupertino just on the off chance of irking an Appletini.

Scrambling

The iPhone game craze is everywhere, and for some reason controversial. If playing a game keeps a kid quiet in line, or me from eavesdropping on the conversation next to me while my husband is in the restroom - what's the problem? Isn't it better that the kid doesn't cry and I don't snicker at things I shouldn't be hearing?

In my opinion the word games are by far the best. That may be because they are the games in which I have the best chance of winning. That being said, they are really stimulating and should be embraced more in schools. I'm sure I'd be happy if my child was playing word games throughout the day instead of sitting idly - but feel free to ask me that again in 15 years. Words with Friends may not be the most educational game since now people just know the highest scoring 2 letter words, even if they have no idea what xi or qi mean. W.E.L.D.E.R. is a great game if you haven't played it yet. It requires some quiet and concentration, but at least it will give you the definitions for all of the words you don't know.

My favorite game of the moment is Scramble with Friends. DOWNLOAD IT RIGHT NOW and start a game with me. There are not enough people playing this game yet and I am completely hooked. Zynga is getting really sneaky with how to make money on these games by adding the tokens to this one. It's bad enough we have to endure all the crappy ads, but now we have to buy, or wait for tokens to take our turn? Really, Zynga? Really?


All the same download it, start a game with me and play with the sound on. The sound really makes the game.

Clutching On

Apple has become a part of all facets of everyday life, even fashion. Last weekend I saw a gorgeous leather Hobo clutch complete with an iPhone cut out to showcase the specially designed smartphone sleeve. It seems every woman is like me, trying to figure out how to keep the phone within reach without taking away from the outfit. This obviously is more of an issue at night, especially on a date. You want to look killer but if the date is horrible you need to text your girlfriends his ridiculous soundbites, or take your turn at Words.

I've seen several good versions of the iPhone clutch, which is really just a glorified case-wallet combination. The glitziest is definitely Michael Kors, with the most elegant version belonging to Kate Spade. (I doubt anyone is surprised by that.) My favorite is actually the Hex version. It is much closer to a case than a clutch, but it holds my phone, ID and credit card for a quick trip to the store or to slip in my husband's pocket when going out. All of these are conveniently available in Apple's Corporate Store for a quick side by side. No matter which version you find, it will be a life saver when standing in line at a club. We've all been the girl fumbling through her bag looking for her ID long after her group has gone inside. Don't be that girl.

Apple Fuzz

Apple is notorious for its security, as it should be. Apple is not to be messed with. Which is why I am constantly shocked when people do. My husband and I went for a bike ride last weekend and he had to stop by his office. While navigating the infinite loop we saw people with their faces smashed against the lobby doors trying to get a closer look and taking pictures up into the 3rd floor offices. My husband suggested they limit their picture taking to the Apple signs instead of into offices, as unbeknownst to the tourists Apple Security was watching from the parking lot - they are always watching. I was left on the curb as my husband went upstairs, and am happy to report they heeded his warning and skipped merrily down the loop.

The Apple frenzy isn't limited to just the general public and tourists, but the Press as well. The Shareholders meeting was last week, so I made a wide birth around Infinite Loop. But sure enough the press ran rampant around the headquarters just as they always do. It seems every time there is a big event at Apple members of the press get into fender benders in the parking lot trying to get a closer look or just trying to avoid security.

It may be a wonderland and one of the friendliest places on earth, but before you start singing It's A Small World, remember the Apple is crawling with fuzz.

Siri-ites do read!

Last night we went to Lowes in search of a grill. Everyone in the suburbs owns a grill - it's mandatory. We ran into a fellow Siri-ite while perusing the giant aisles filled with things that only people living outside of a city have room for.  When we got to the register there was a problem with our order in their system. The cashier started jabbing at buttons in her frustration making the whole thing freeze. Then the amazing thing happened...she rebooted.

Imagine if you can two Siri-ites staring at the computer screens, their faces lit up like a 3 year old seeing his oversized birthday cake for the first time. The exchange went something like this.

"Look! Its PXE booting."
"Hey, it's loading Linux!"
"Is that Gentoo Linux?"
"Haha! It's starting SSH!!"
"Wait, why did it start XII if it's running a NCurses App?"
"Maybe, it's an AS400 emulator?"

Then the Lowes logo appeared in ASCII Art to which even I got excited.

Working the Apple Core

The Apple Gym is a wonderful place - mainly because they always have infused water and Starbucks coffee to help pull you through a workout. I've been checking out different group classes at the gym, and am really impressed by how many Appletinis pull themselves away from their laptops to work out. Of course, the classes are all scheduled before work, during lunch or after work - but still the turn out is impressive.

One of the first classes I attended was Apple Core. That's right, they actually call it Apple Core. How could I not go? Just to prove how small the Bay Area actually is, a fellow SF Conservatory alum was in the class. It was two days before the Super Bowl, so naturally we were having a party at our new apartment that weekend. (My husband actually insisted we move the weekend before the Super Bowl to make sure we were all set up for the big game.) I invited her to the party but seeing how we are both Conservatory alums we had no idea what time kick off was. We turned to the few men who were left in the class and asked what time the game started. None of them knew, and one actually asked what game I was referring to. A fair response I guess when we had just completed a class called Apple Core. We went to the front desk and repeated our question to the guys there. They suggested we look on Google. Lesson learned.

(You may be wondering why I didn't just ask Siri. She was not with me at the time. I may enjoy her company but I don't need her snarky remarks while I'm trying to work out.)

Meeting Up

Now that I'm in the 'burbs I've accepted Meetup as my new best friend, and the only way to search for some semblance of normal. I attended a book club last weekend for women in their 20s and 30s living in the South Bay. The book was Tina Fey's Bossypants which was a riot. It's like reading an episode of 30 Rock and takes all of four hours to get through. My only warning with the book is to read it in a group or completely alone. Otherwise you feel like a tool laughing by yourself every other line and looking for someone to make eye contact so you can read the joke out loud.

I actually convinced my husband to read the book as well. It is a great introduction to reading for the geek in your life who only believes in reading Gizmodo, Techcrunch, etc. I was told by another Siri-ite that I should not expect my husband to read when he gets home since that is all they do all day - read and look for solutions which is too difficult to keep up all night as well. Apparently Siri is so demanding of these poor guys that when they get home they hide from all things geeky and take comfort in analog. That suddenly explains why my husband hasn't fully set up the entertainment center or his beloved SmartHome lights since we moved into our new place.

The book club consisted of a handful of women. They all worked in various fields and lived in different cities in the Peninsula and South Bay. However, there was one common thread throughout the group. We had all moved to the area for our husbands who work in Tech and were desperately seeking non-techie outlets and "normal" aka non-Tech people. There was one women who had lived in Sunnyvale for five years, just a few minutes north of my new home. She assured me that it is just as bad as I fear it is and you never get used to it. Splendid. Thank you Meetup. 

Appleville

We finally bit the bullet and moved down to Appleville last month. It was something I had been advocating since my husband first accepted the position at Apple, so you'd think I would have thrilled. But when I turned my back on the stunning bay views from our SoMa apartment, dogs in tow, to make the trek down to our new apartment in Cupertino, the moment was more bitter than sweet.

That being said, Cupertino is an interesting place. It truly is all things Apple. There are far more Apple campuses in this town then I could have ever imagined. I pass at least three Apple busses/shuttles every time I'm in the car. Having spent almost the last decade in San Francisco, it seems odd that everything is literally a 15 minute drive away and I never have to worry about parking.

I now assume that everyone I encounter works for Apple, or has some sort of dealings with Apple - especially when I'm in close proximity of Infinite Loop. My interactions with the Appletinis vary greatly. Most are nice enough and very focused on what they are doing. Maybe only half of the employees make eye contact with me when crossing campus. Though, that may be due to the glaring white sticker that's always on my chest declaring me as an outsider.

The worst encounter I've had to date with an Apple employee was a just a few days after moving to Cupertino. My husband was out of town working and I was left to face Apple alone. Though Apple is a wonderful place when you have an escort, the layers of secrecy and security are a bit intimidating. Our new puppy had decided to turn the power adapter into a chew toy, leaving my MacBook Pro dead to the world and me with no means of meeting a deadline. My husband arranged for his office adapter to be left at the front desk of Apple. Unfortunately, I arrived after the doors had been locked for the evening which I didn't realize until I tried to open the door. That was my fatal error. An employee was coming out of the doors and barely made eye contact while informing me that he wouldn't help me and no one would unless I had a badge. Ah, the sacred Apple badge. I could see a whole slew of Apple Security in the lobby and knew they would be able to help me if he would only let me ask them. But no, of course not. Not without the magic badge.

I was told later that both the front desk staff and security were horrified when they heard about the incident and next time to call Corporate Security directly. Apparently they are always happy to help an Apple Wife in need. I was just unlucky enough to encounter an employee with Appletude - a condition similar to Little Man Syndrome brought on by too much badge power. Luckily, those employees seem to be few and far between. For the most part they are all kids in a candy store working on the coolest shit on earth.

Becoming Mrs. Siri

Siri has been a large part of my life for over a year now. I envy those who heard her name for the first time last Fall, though I imagine most significant other's of the Siri team feel that way. Siri was the unmentionable mistress in our relationship for most of 2011 - even during our wedding. But now Siri is out of the closet and running rampant with her quirky jokes and sassy comebacks. I've realized it's time to embrace Siri. After all, she may be the other woman but she certainly isn't the mistress even if I did come first. She is the alpha dog in this odd three way marriage so it seems only fitting I take her name and share with the world what's it like to be Mrs. Siri.