Scrambling

The iPhone game craze is everywhere, and for some reason controversial. If playing a game keeps a kid quiet in line, or me from eavesdropping on the conversation next to me while my husband is in the restroom - what's the problem? Isn't it better that the kid doesn't cry and I don't snicker at things I shouldn't be hearing?

In my opinion the word games are by far the best. That may be because they are the games in which I have the best chance of winning. That being said, they are really stimulating and should be embraced more in schools. I'm sure I'd be happy if my child was playing word games throughout the day instead of sitting idly - but feel free to ask me that again in 15 years. Words with Friends may not be the most educational game since now people just know the highest scoring 2 letter words, even if they have no idea what xi or qi mean. W.E.L.D.E.R. is a great game if you haven't played it yet. It requires some quiet and concentration, but at least it will give you the definitions for all of the words you don't know.

My favorite game of the moment is Scramble with Friends. DOWNLOAD IT RIGHT NOW and start a game with me. There are not enough people playing this game yet and I am completely hooked. Zynga is getting really sneaky with how to make money on these games by adding the tokens to this one. It's bad enough we have to endure all the crappy ads, but now we have to buy, or wait for tokens to take our turn? Really, Zynga? Really?


All the same download it, start a game with me and play with the sound on. The sound really makes the game.

Clutching On

Apple has become a part of all facets of everyday life, even fashion. Last weekend I saw a gorgeous leather Hobo clutch complete with an iPhone cut out to showcase the specially designed smartphone sleeve. It seems every woman is like me, trying to figure out how to keep the phone within reach without taking away from the outfit. This obviously is more of an issue at night, especially on a date. You want to look killer but if the date is horrible you need to text your girlfriends his ridiculous soundbites, or take your turn at Words.

I've seen several good versions of the iPhone clutch, which is really just a glorified case-wallet combination. The glitziest is definitely Michael Kors, with the most elegant version belonging to Kate Spade. (I doubt anyone is surprised by that.) My favorite is actually the Hex version. It is much closer to a case than a clutch, but it holds my phone, ID and credit card for a quick trip to the store or to slip in my husband's pocket when going out. All of these are conveniently available in Apple's Corporate Store for a quick side by side. No matter which version you find, it will be a life saver when standing in line at a club. We've all been the girl fumbling through her bag looking for her ID long after her group has gone inside. Don't be that girl.

Apple Fuzz

Apple is notorious for its security, as it should be. Apple is not to be messed with. Which is why I am constantly shocked when people do. My husband and I went for a bike ride last weekend and he had to stop by his office. While navigating the infinite loop we saw people with their faces smashed against the lobby doors trying to get a closer look and taking pictures up into the 3rd floor offices. My husband suggested they limit their picture taking to the Apple signs instead of into offices, as unbeknownst to the tourists Apple Security was watching from the parking lot - they are always watching. I was left on the curb as my husband went upstairs, and am happy to report they heeded his warning and skipped merrily down the loop.

The Apple frenzy isn't limited to just the general public and tourists, but the Press as well. The Shareholders meeting was last week, so I made a wide birth around Infinite Loop. But sure enough the press ran rampant around the headquarters just as they always do. It seems every time there is a big event at Apple members of the press get into fender benders in the parking lot trying to get a closer look or just trying to avoid security.

It may be a wonderland and one of the friendliest places on earth, but before you start singing It's A Small World, remember the Apple is crawling with fuzz.

Siri-ites do read!

Last night we went to Lowes in search of a grill. Everyone in the suburbs owns a grill - it's mandatory. We ran into a fellow Siri-ite while perusing the giant aisles filled with things that only people living outside of a city have room for.  When we got to the register there was a problem with our order in their system. The cashier started jabbing at buttons in her frustration making the whole thing freeze. Then the amazing thing happened...she rebooted.

Imagine if you can two Siri-ites staring at the computer screens, their faces lit up like a 3 year old seeing his oversized birthday cake for the first time. The exchange went something like this.

"Look! Its PXE booting."
"Hey, it's loading Linux!"
"Is that Gentoo Linux?"
"Haha! It's starting SSH!!"
"Wait, why did it start XII if it's running a NCurses App?"
"Maybe, it's an AS400 emulator?"

Then the Lowes logo appeared in ASCII Art to which even I got excited.

Working the Apple Core

The Apple Gym is a wonderful place - mainly because they always have infused water and Starbucks coffee to help pull you through a workout. I've been checking out different group classes at the gym, and am really impressed by how many Appletinis pull themselves away from their laptops to work out. Of course, the classes are all scheduled before work, during lunch or after work - but still the turn out is impressive.

One of the first classes I attended was Apple Core. That's right, they actually call it Apple Core. How could I not go? Just to prove how small the Bay Area actually is, a fellow SF Conservatory alum was in the class. It was two days before the Super Bowl, so naturally we were having a party at our new apartment that weekend. (My husband actually insisted we move the weekend before the Super Bowl to make sure we were all set up for the big game.) I invited her to the party but seeing how we are both Conservatory alums we had no idea what time kick off was. We turned to the few men who were left in the class and asked what time the game started. None of them knew, and one actually asked what game I was referring to. A fair response I guess when we had just completed a class called Apple Core. We went to the front desk and repeated our question to the guys there. They suggested we look on Google. Lesson learned.

(You may be wondering why I didn't just ask Siri. She was not with me at the time. I may enjoy her company but I don't need her snarky remarks while I'm trying to work out.)

Meeting Up

Now that I'm in the 'burbs I've accepted Meetup as my new best friend, and the only way to search for some semblance of normal. I attended a book club last weekend for women in their 20s and 30s living in the South Bay. The book was Tina Fey's Bossypants which was a riot. It's like reading an episode of 30 Rock and takes all of four hours to get through. My only warning with the book is to read it in a group or completely alone. Otherwise you feel like a tool laughing by yourself every other line and looking for someone to make eye contact so you can read the joke out loud.

I actually convinced my husband to read the book as well. It is a great introduction to reading for the geek in your life who only believes in reading Gizmodo, Techcrunch, etc. I was told by another Siri-ite that I should not expect my husband to read when he gets home since that is all they do all day - read and look for solutions which is too difficult to keep up all night as well. Apparently Siri is so demanding of these poor guys that when they get home they hide from all things geeky and take comfort in analog. That suddenly explains why my husband hasn't fully set up the entertainment center or his beloved SmartHome lights since we moved into our new place.

The book club consisted of a handful of women. They all worked in various fields and lived in different cities in the Peninsula and South Bay. However, there was one common thread throughout the group. We had all moved to the area for our husbands who work in Tech and were desperately seeking non-techie outlets and "normal" aka non-Tech people. There was one women who had lived in Sunnyvale for five years, just a few minutes north of my new home. She assured me that it is just as bad as I fear it is and you never get used to it. Splendid. Thank you Meetup. 

Appleville

We finally bit the bullet and moved down to Appleville last month. It was something I had been advocating since my husband first accepted the position at Apple, so you'd think I would have thrilled. But when I turned my back on the stunning bay views from our SoMa apartment, dogs in tow, to make the trek down to our new apartment in Cupertino, the moment was more bitter than sweet.

That being said, Cupertino is an interesting place. It truly is all things Apple. There are far more Apple campuses in this town then I could have ever imagined. I pass at least three Apple busses/shuttles every time I'm in the car. Having spent almost the last decade in San Francisco, it seems odd that everything is literally a 15 minute drive away and I never have to worry about parking.

I now assume that everyone I encounter works for Apple, or has some sort of dealings with Apple - especially when I'm in close proximity of Infinite Loop. My interactions with the Appletinis vary greatly. Most are nice enough and very focused on what they are doing. Maybe only half of the employees make eye contact with me when crossing campus. Though, that may be due to the glaring white sticker that's always on my chest declaring me as an outsider.

The worst encounter I've had to date with an Apple employee was a just a few days after moving to Cupertino. My husband was out of town working and I was left to face Apple alone. Though Apple is a wonderful place when you have an escort, the layers of secrecy and security are a bit intimidating. Our new puppy had decided to turn the power adapter into a chew toy, leaving my MacBook Pro dead to the world and me with no means of meeting a deadline. My husband arranged for his office adapter to be left at the front desk of Apple. Unfortunately, I arrived after the doors had been locked for the evening which I didn't realize until I tried to open the door. That was my fatal error. An employee was coming out of the doors and barely made eye contact while informing me that he wouldn't help me and no one would unless I had a badge. Ah, the sacred Apple badge. I could see a whole slew of Apple Security in the lobby and knew they would be able to help me if he would only let me ask them. But no, of course not. Not without the magic badge.

I was told later that both the front desk staff and security were horrified when they heard about the incident and next time to call Corporate Security directly. Apparently they are always happy to help an Apple Wife in need. I was just unlucky enough to encounter an employee with Appletude - a condition similar to Little Man Syndrome brought on by too much badge power. Luckily, those employees seem to be few and far between. For the most part they are all kids in a candy store working on the coolest shit on earth.

Becoming Mrs. Siri

Siri has been a large part of my life for over a year now. I envy those who heard her name for the first time last Fall, though I imagine most significant other's of the Siri team feel that way. Siri was the unmentionable mistress in our relationship for most of 2011 - even during our wedding. But now Siri is out of the closet and running rampant with her quirky jokes and sassy comebacks. I've realized it's time to embrace Siri. After all, she may be the other woman but she certainly isn't the mistress even if I did come first. She is the alpha dog in this odd three way marriage so it seems only fitting I take her name and share with the world what's it like to be Mrs. Siri.